Many readers have queried me lately, asking what I have been up to while the PWF has been hiatusing due to Christian's marauding zombie hordes and the end of civilization as we know it.
Do these people not know how to read, akin to Dominic Jones? Panjabe has been busy, busy, busy! For example, just the other day, I was bebopping around all outside of the town, when a couple of kids who were up to no good started making trouble in my neighborhood! I swear, I got in one little fight, and my mom got scared.
Hahaha, that is a little joke for you dear readers who remember the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. When did Will Smith become a serious actor? This is ridiculous. To me he will always be the Fresh Prince, or occasionally the rambunctious one-liner-spouting hotshot fighter pilot from Independence Day. Will Smith in serious movies is as off-putting as it would be if, say, Mario Lopez were to star in a series of poignant dramas, or even worse, if Marc Alaimo were to not be an evil, conniving Cardassian full of plots and schemes. Or if Dominic Jones were to be something other than a fool of mythic proportions.
Note to self: check Marc Alaimo's IMDB later. Also the guy who played Garak.
Back on topic though, of course Panjabe's magazine duties have fallen by the wayside, with little in the way of new news to write about. We're all hoping that a ragtag but gritty band of survivors from all walks of life will survive the initial zombie invasion and barricade themselves behind safe walls in order to fend off the ever-growing army of the undead, and eventually manage to form a small society that would one day rise up to reclaim the Earth from the zombie hordes, at least up until the meteor hits. In the meantime, though, those of us who are not lucky enough to survive the zombie attacks are stuck in the PWF Magazine offices, without any episodes of Wargames or even Thrillzone to write about! No one is even giving any interviews, even those saucy wenches in the PWF Spirit Squad. Panjabe is, in a word, very bored. Also, angry at Dominic Jones for still being alive.
Without any articles to write, times are tough. Many methods have been attempted for staving off boredom, including but not limited to binge drinking, buffet ransacking, darts (using Dominic Jones as a dartboard), selling bootleg PWF merchandise out of the back of a van (Waldorf Gipper, I'm looking in your direction), and a few unruly employees have even resorted to a ridiculously early attempt to repopulate the species. People, don't you understand you have to wait until after the zombies are done marauding? While the attacks are still going on, you run the risk of any new children being infected, and a baby zombie is the most dangerous kind!
They're delicious, though.
Never mind. I think I hear some banging on the wall. It's either zombies breaking into the building, or the accursed Dominic Jones has figured out I locked him into the supply closet. Either way, time to beat feet!
